Oh No! Look Out! Little Satanist Are Coming To Your Door!
As kids, we all remember the excitement that the end of October brought; pumpkin carving, costume parties, "It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown", and Halloween episodes of your favorite 80's sitcoms. Every store in town had an aisle dedicated to costumes, all of which were in cardboard boxes with clear windows on the top so you could see the hard plastic mask inside and the vinyl costume underneath and the aisle with more candy than you had seen all year. The school Halloween parties where each kid wore their costume and paraded down the halls and through the classrooms to show off your bitchin' Darth Vader outfit or you Bionic Women kit.There would be half a dozen haunted houses that teenagers would stand in freezing rain to go through and bon fires for the adults to stand around in half-ass costumes while inbiding on Pabst or Falstaff.
All of this Halloween fun went on year after year my entire childhood and believe it or not...
We didn't all turn into Satanists!
But now, the elementary school kids in our school district (Rockwood) can't have Halloween parties. There are billboards in several parts of St. Louis adverstising "Realty Houses" as an alternative to Haunted Houses and today I saw signs available at a gas station in Kirkwood that say "NO TREATS! BAN THE GLORIFICATION OF SATAN!"
Really.
People have lost their minds.
Who the hell really thinks that Halloween has anything to do with Satan? No one but an idiots, and well you know the world is ful of them. Halloween comes from the traditions of Samhaim which was a day to celebrate the honored dead and remember family members that had died and to wear scary costumes to ward off evil, not call for it. I'm sure you know who to thank for the Satanic slant on Halloween, I don't think I have to name them, but it rhymes with Tristan.
Now and for nearly all of modern history Halloween has been about two things; candy and pretending to be someone you're not. There is nothing else to it. You crazy churchies can give up on all the Satan crap, we're not buying it. Anyway, Satan, really? Give me a break.
The funny thing is that the more churches try to stop Halloween the more people start to see how ridiculous churches are. To give you an idea how far they will go, there is a baptist church in Eureka Missouri that is doing a "reality house" that is a spin on the Hell House concept wherein the house displays scense of tragity and violence and attempts to scare you into thinking that if you don't drink their kool-aide your going to go to hell. The concept is really disturbing and uses fear to prompt people to convert.
Isn't that sort of against the very basic ethics of Christianity, just sayin'.
I've included a clip of a documentary on a hell house in Colorado that should fully illustrate my point.
I say, leave Halloween alone! Stop trying to turn everything kids have into some kind of mind control and keep your religion out of my fun!
With all due respect,
The Chief
1 comment:
The anti-halloweeners are the same ones who bring you 'No Pledge of Allegiance in Schools,' and 'Holiday Season,' instead of Christmas. Some of them are potentially churchgoers gone nuts, but I think that most are just raving communists who want to destroy ANYTHING they can about the American way of life. They want OUR America to disappear, and become THEIR United Socialist States of America. We must resist. Buy guns...and ammo. ;-)
Signed, Sons of American Freedom on Steroids and Amphetamines HOO-AAGH
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