Travel Advisory for Idiots

Travel is every mans' right and most men's dream. To see the world and all its wonders is an aspiration we all share. Interacting with cultures and people whose language, cuisine and interpersonal styles that are different than our own is way to not only elevate our understanding of this planets social diversity but to better share our culture with the world.

But you've got to use some common sense people!

Many countries receive Americans with open arms, sometime they cross their fingers but they allow us and want us and enjoy having us visit without hesitation or reservation.

Do you know which ones they are?

Its easy. They are the ones that don't shot rockets at our planes, or threaten to drop nukes on us or the ones that don't cut off our journalist's heads.

You know, England, Mexico, Canada, Germany, Japan, China, Spain, France, Italy, Greece, Thailand, India, to name a few.

Can you guess which ones you shouldn't go to?
Maybe Iraq or Iran sound like poor travel choices? How about Darfur, Sudan or Lebanon? And maybe you haven't heard, but North Korea is not really hot on Americans these days either.

Come on people, really. Does our government have to start incarcerating you idiots after you get out of the Venezuelan prison to keep you from traveling to place that should be obvious problems?

As a blatant example, lets look at the recent situation with the two idiots that North Korea just release, Laura Ling and Euna Lee.

These two snuck into North Korea from China to interview defectors from North Korea and film their escapes across a frozen river between North Korea and China. They had been warned by Chinese officials not to venture into NK.

Did they listen? No. So, they were arrested and detained and there was little hope that these two idiots were getting out once Pyongyang realized that they were holding the sister of Lisa Ling, the reporter who had also snuck in and interviewed people off the streets of North Korea and uncovered Kim Jong Il's deity status, his ban on outside media, misinformation campaigns and out right brainwashing of his people.

The thing that really stands out as stupid is that they were told by numerous people in the know, that going over to North Korea was a bad idea, especially for Ling. But hey its ok, we can just send good ol' Bill over to fix things right up. You know because he's not busy and the North Koreans are reasonable people after all, right?

In case you didn't know the United States Department of State generates a list of places the Ma and Pa Kettle with their Piggly Wiggly bag luggage should avoid, but honestly all you have to do is watch the news once a month. If you hear the name of the country you want to visit in the same news piece that also include words like "terrorists", "bombings", "behead" or "kidnapping" DON'T GO.

And if you a journalist with big ideas of uncovering government corruption or human trafficking, don't bother, we already know that the whole planet is screwed up and we don't need you sticking your nose in it. Bill Clintons busy; he can't keep giving photo-ops to dictator midgets.

W.T.F. MAN!!!

I try to stay as far away from malls as humanly possible. Unfortunately, I upon occasion have to go, being that it is one of the only places to look at all things Mac. Begrudgingly, I go...

While there the other day I saw a couple of things that I had to comment on.

Firstly, eyebrow weaving!? Jumpin' Jehosephat! What in Gods name is this shit?! Do they make little baskets on someone's eyebrow? Does one have to possess a thick Italian unibrow to be able to have this procedure done?

Is this some sort of quasi-occupational therapy for the criminally insane? I really don't even want to know....

It sounds like someone has figured out another way to separate you from your money in the name of fashion, or whatever the Hells going on, yet again! I think it's probably a covert recruitment operation for the Taliban!! Yeah! That's it. "Come, get your eyebrows weaved and please watch this training, errr, product video."

Secondly, Hot Topic!! Corporate shills turning a cultural movement into marketing to the masses!! YEAH...... I know this has been done with many other movements, but this one hits too close to home for Angry! Where I grew up people that didn't have perfectly coiffured, feathered hair, Levi's leather shoes( I think they were made by Levi. Maybe

Darth or the Chief can remember. Anyone else remember those asinine, retard-o shoes? ), Levi's denim jacket, and a KShit 95 T-shirt with the original fox/pig thing smokin' a doobie in Day-Glo orange no less, was a freak and quite possibly homosexual too!! Well, I was as usual, the odd-ball in school. Having shock-white, Billy Idol-esqe hair, Misfit t-shirts, jeans with holes ( cause momma was poor ), combat boots, Jet-black eye-liner, etc. I stuck out like, not just a sore thumb, but a thumb smashed by a 15 pound maul that had become infected and had begun to balloon to 2x its size! I can't even recall how many fights I got into just for the way I looked! More times than not, surprising some microcephalic jock that thought I'd be an easy target, only to kick the ever loving shit out of his surprised ass!!! Don't fuck with small, angry, punk rock, Irish/German kids. Most of us are already so on edge you might be the straw that breaks the proverbial camels back! Back to Hot Topic. This is yet another example of ideas bastardized and manipulated until it becomes socially acceptable. " Show mom and dad you're a rebel! But do it in the safety and comfort of your local mall." or, " Show 'The Man' were to stick it! But first, buy it in a store in a mall run by Him!" Punk is definitely dead! Keep shopping..... Zombies

Long Live the D.K.'s!!! Angry BraDy

The Great Beer Summit

Photo Op Time!

By now I'm sure everyone knows about the "Beer Summit" between the President, Professor Henry Louis Gates, Jr. and Sgt. James Crowley.

If you haven't heard the story here's the Cliff Notes' version:
On July 23rd, a neighbor called the Cambridge police to report that two black males with backpacks were trying to gain entry into Professor Gates' home.
Cambridge police Sergeant James Crowley and Officer Carlos Figueroa arrived to investigate.
Gates could not provide proper ID to prove that he lived there. Only a ID showing that he was a professor at Harvard.
At some point the professor began yelling at the police officers when asked to step onto the porch, "No. I will not.,"
Then he followed up with such rants as "This is what happens to black men in America!", "ya, I'll speak with your mama outside." and the total asshole line of "You don't know who you're messing with."

To make things worse, Professor Gates is a friend of President Obama.
When asked by the press to comment on the situation, the President replied that he didn't know all of the details but that the Cambridge Police Department acted "stupidly". (Of course, I'm paraphrasing the President. We don't have the room for all the ums... and uhhs...)
Guess what? If you don't know all the facts of the situation...don't comment on it! Especially when you're the President of the United States.

This was not a "black" thing Mr. President. It was a man disobeying the police thing.

It gets better. When more of the facts come out the President speaks to Sergeant Crowley and they decide that the 3 of them should all sit down and have a beer.

Cut to CNN broadcasting almost 2 minutes of nothing but the sound of cameras clicking while these three have a cold one. No audio of them speaking. Probably the biggest news let down since Geraldo accessed Al Capone's vault.

Then again, think of all the free advertising Bud Light, Blue Moon and Red Stripe received.

Red Stripe? Really.

News!! Print, Media, and The Net

Greetings and salutations!

I have almost completely "weened" myself from the large and enticing, but ever growing and ominous teat that is Google. Browser has changed, e-mail is in process, and I have found other places to glean images and the like. If you can't comprehend why, or you still think it's just the "do no evil",their own words, big fluffy friend that has all the answers, then have a look at this...

DO NO EVIL

If your attention span is that of a gnat, email me. I send ya' the PDF. This is part of an ongoing story and I digress.

The actual premise of today's meanderings is that of the news sites I have encountered, and my continued belief that society is coughing up sputum from the More, Better, Faster, Shinier Virus it has contracted.

Perusing some of these "news" sites makes me ill!! Even from the likes of the BBC, Washington Post, New York Times, etc,etc. Actual news that can be informative, thought provoking, and that might even convince me that I'm not being lied to.... About 30%. That's being generous!!

The rest... ABSOLUTE BULLSHIT!! Don't believe me? Check out The L.A. Times. This is the fucking front page!! Check out as many others as you care to. The BBC is probably the closest thing to news that I remember.

Television, rrrrrh, I don't even wanna get started on that worthless medium!! The only thing I can discern as news on that shit is traffic, and to a much lesser extent weather. An even lesser extent may be news of missiles heading our way!

Have our attention spans really gotten down to 3 second sound bites, Beer Summits, and which celebrity is doing whatever the fuck those people do?! Plastic! We love it!! We love it so much, when Dow came out with the shit, it wasn't long after we had to start living it, consuming it, being it.

My moniker fits me, with good reason! If others were to take the blinders off and smell the turd, and not recoil back into Plastic World; to really look at what is going on around them, we may be in a much better spot. How does everybody think we get into the messes of the variety we are in now?

Want an answer?? COMPLACENCY!!!!!! Power loves that shit. What's on the news is only a symbol people. Are you too busy being mind-fucked by your bag of MSG laden chips and your NutriSweet fortified cola? "It's all the good stuff, so you won't fight so much"!!

Back to Dreamland....

ANgrY brADy

Eat This Not That, You Friggin' Idiot

Come on people do you really need a book that tells you not to eat a burger with three patties, three slices of cheese and thousand island dressing?

Really? Are you all that stupid?

What really blows my fucking mind is that there is not one book but three, one for fat adults, one for their fat kids and one so that the fat family can figure out that shit with names like Chessy Straws, Pillsbury Big Deluxe Classics White Chunk Macadamia Nut and Butter Bits are not health food. For god sakes, "Big" and "Chunk" don't give you a frigging clue?

Its 2009, if you don't know that ground chuck and peanut butter ice cream sandwiches make your ass big, than you are an idiot. If you need to buy a book that tells you not to eat a banana split with caramel, chocolate and strawberry sauces, whipped cream and three scoops of ice cream from Cold Stone, you should be spending the $24.95 to buy a goalie mask to keep your fork hand from reaching your mouth.

Sorry folk, I don't fell bad for fatties that eat shit all day long, buy books like these and read them while they lay on the damn couch.

I don't.

You're fat because you eat too much, not because you don't know what not to eat. If you really don't know what not to eat, heres a tip:

Try just not eating the crap you have been for the last few years. That should be a good start. Its obviously not good for you.

If you already own this book and you can't see your feet, well I told you.

With all due respect,
The Chief

Big, Fat and Stupid

The year I was born, 1970, the obesity rate in this country was 9.7% among the total population, the rate among teenagers was less than 5%.

Also in 1970, the United States ranked number one in math, science and reading scores. Although the data was not as complete globally as it is today its a safe bet that we were on top.

In 1970 the Americans exported more than they imported, we considered a 16 ounce Coke from McDonalds a LARGE, if you couldn't read a kid's handwriting he spent the next week practicing s's and u's and a XXXL shirt was only available at the carnival.

Now 30.6% of Americans are obese, where as most of Asia falls under 4%, 27.6% of kids are big fat asses. American students are not even in the top 20 in math science and reading scores, being betting by the likes of Poland, Ireland, Estonia and Macau. (Where the hell is Macau again...) and a 66% of all T-shirts sold in this country are at least an XL. Worst of all we are spending $147,000,000,000.00 a year on taking care of our biggest, fattest and stupidest.

What a bunch of big, fat IDIOTS we have become! We should be ashamed of ourselves, but its not our faults though.

No.

Its a plan by the Chinese to take over. Make us fat, lazy and stupid and they don't even have to launch a missile. They can just sail on over and push our big fat flabby butts into the streets. Brilliant.

Yeah, really.

Right, I mean it has to be. It can't possibly be that our "I want it all and I want it now" mentality is paying off. It couldn't be the benefit of kinder, gentler parenting, sharing and giving every one a turn. It's definitely not the result of test scores based teaching versus content based teaching.

Nope, its got to be the Chinese.

Because its never our fault.

With all due respect,

The Chief

Men, and the Dicks in their Hand

Hey folks, Dirty Darril has another thing to talk about.
Normally I would tell you to sit down and shut the fuck up but this week I am taking a different approach. I have been bashing women alot in my past posts, so this week I am going to bash men. Yeah I said it, MEN.

We men are, for the most part, good guys, but just like the select women I write about we have our asshole men.

First I would like to point out the guys that think it's cool to bash their wife or girlfriend in front of the other guys. You are a real piece of work, and the guys you are trying to impress think that you are a nothing for what you say. If what you say is true, you should not be with this woman, if it isn't true you are a definate asshole. (and not one worthy of this site)

Second, you stupid selfish motherfuckers that don't take responsibility for the kids that you have created and just disregard that they are yours.
Thank you fuckface, now I have to help pay for your child. Your son will probably steal my car or rob my house or your daughter will be the next stripper I put my dollar between the tits that her 65 year old sugar daddy bought her when she turned 22. As much as I like your daughter, you are not around to be a father figure so I know that when her looks fail to make her Miss Center Stage she will have a few kids who's sperm doner won't be around either and here we go with the WIC and welfare that comes out of my check. Thanks dick!

Now let's talk about you strong manly men that like to hit women. Do you feel good about what you do? Why don't you e-mail me and make some time to hit somebody that can hit you back and fuck you up! You are the lowest piece of shit there is. Learn to walk away, put down the stag beer and take care of shit. Mr. I'm-sorry-every-Sunday-morning don't cut it jerk. Grow up and be a man!

Now I said all that to say this: I mean what I said above and men can be dicks...
But...
You women are easy to bash because all you do is bitch, and the bitching leads to us just running out on you and the kids so that we don't murder you all. Because while we are at work you are training little Cindy to be a bitch like you are, and if we don't run we end up beating you not because we want to but, god damn, your Dad failed to put sense into you so now we must beat it into you.

Bottom line: Keep your mouth shut and take care of your husband and maybe, just maybe, you won't have that thump on the back of your head that is covered by your hair so that you can't prove shit, or if it's real bad you won't take that fall down the steps after you come out of the bathroom smiling, saying it's positive.

I by no means am trying to be cruel, but if early in life daddy left or sister Mary made you bump fuzzies with her you need to get over it. You probably came then anyway so just chalk it up as another time. Bitching at your man for reasons that mean nothing come to no avail.
Most of what you say means nothing anyway.
Grow up girls, and take it like a man!