Even The Rev Should Laugh at This...

The funniest thing on the internet!

-Darth

.

Quick hit

I knew there was something wrong with this backwater town I'm doing work in......







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Just in case anybody needs my credentials...

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745 Million "EAT SHIT AND DIE's" to AT$Twatz

Well, the man that wears the tin foil hat is back with you, and in an even Angrier mood than ever! The end is neigh!! Why you may ask?
The free exchange of ideas and the best tool in which to arm ones self is getting the old back-door, bend-over-I'm-drivin', routine! It would seem with many in the highest offices, the cubicle jockeys, and even on down to the filth muckers; could give two worthless shits about it!!
I'm of course talking about anyone that has Internet service, especially and more specifically those with AT&T DSL or U-verse service. It would seem that those that do have DSL with that sleeping beast known as AT&T get to throw less of a party and more of a wake! Yes my FIENDS, look very soon for data caps, bandwidth throttling, and the pleasure and honor of possibly getting service shut off if you so much as even complain to ANYONE at Ma' Bell! All of this and more, regardless of your connection speed!! This is what your hard earned money gets you for a PAYING SERVICE! You know, the kind of service where it used to be, the customer is always right, consumer protections used to be in place, a service paid for granted the payor certain rights, etc!






















If you live under a rock or possibly spend all of your time twaddling about on Twater or FecalBook or sitting in front of the "the Brain Sucker" waiting slack-jawed, drooling to hear the next Justin Bieber(sp? Fuck I don't listen to this twerp!) song so you can orgasm on your "Pleather" recliner, then you may or may not know what I'm talking about, or more likely the issue hurts the few remaining neurons to even consider it, that, well, YA JUST DON'T!
Let me tell you all something right now... You, meaning all of us need to get serious about this shit, NOW!!! If not, where would you all consider things too much?! Paying for the right to have the President, the board and all share holders, not only anally rape your wife/husband but tell you your next, but no one is taking turns on you, you get them all at once! Or maybe cameras installed in, not only every room in your house AND the toilet bowl, but being told they will be placing retinal detecting diodes behind your eyes????! Cause you never know, you might stare at something too long and that may mean you are either considering sex with it, or because you want to covet it. This would of course mean you might be copy-WRONG!
Infringing, maybe not physically, but Goddammit, if you look at it it must mean someone has to make some money off of it or you're gonna thieve the fucker eventually!
And you know what'll happen then, eh?!




















The story is really too much to go on about in this tirade, but the particulars are this, 150 gigs a month cap DSL, 250 U-Verse with $5-15 overage charges per 5-10 gigs. If your household is even perceived as a large data use home, well then get ready when your wanting to sit down to that streaming episode of XYZ SHOW, etc, to have nice choppy, stuttering frame rates and lost connections/timeouts in " PEAK HOURS"( whenever the fuck that is! If you get upset that a service that you pay fuck loads of money for and POSSIBLY have read the small print of the agreement and it never stated anything like this as a term of your pay service; that you decide to call or write AT&T... Get ready to be perceived as threatening them and they will kindly shut your shit down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anybody see anything wrong with any of this?!

















AT&Twat claims this is in response to the ever growing problem of clogged bandwidth. BULLSHIT YOU FUCKERS! Many studies have been done that cite otherwise! Hell, users of cable broadband have more worries in that regard, they use a dry loop system that every user is part of. Not so with DSL. The real reason is about stuff like power, money, pressure from other "groups",you know who I'm talking about, RIGHT??!

THE BIGGER FACTOR IN THIS HOGWASH IS THAT AT&T HAS BEEN WILDLY PROFITABLE THE LAST 5 or MORE YEARS! LAST YEAR ALONE THEY RAKED IN 20.1 BILLION DOLLARS! THAT WAS TAKE HOME! NOT TOTAL...
THEY MADE ENOUGH MONEY TO SWALLOW UP THAT GERMAN TELCOM T-MOBILE JUST RECENTLY(another story altogether).

















In closing, FUCK YOU AT&DeucheCom, you fucking NAZI assholes! You get my vote for the "first up against the wall when the revolution comes"!







































P.S. If you think 150 gigs sounds like a lot of bandwidth, how many of you own P.C.'s and have a security update seemingly perpetually installing, or how many of you use HULU or YouTube, etc? Or for that matter have DropBox or other cloud based storage going on??? Ever added up that bandwidth? Try it sometime... That all counts as bandwidth, email too!
Then maybe you'll start to worry and then get angry enough to actually do something about it...

UPDATE......
P.S.!!!!
Anybody get any correspondence in the mail from AT & Twink yet??????


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Stan Lee Predicted the End Times!

My goodness!

Did you realize 9/11 was predicted way back in 1972?
It was in Avengers #37.
Or that the earthquake in Japan was prophecized in Iron Man Annual #5.
You don't know all this?
It's all there in CMYK!
Of course radical Muslims didn't attack New York City it was Hydra and there wasn't an earthquake it was the power-hungry Mandarin.

All kidding aside, that paragraph of bullshit was inspired by the below status update that's floating around Facebook. If you didn't run across it here it is:
Sept 11th (NewYork) Jan 11th (Haiti) and March 11th (Japan)........Luke 21:10-11 Then jesus said to his disciples : "Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom There will be great earthquakes', famines and pestilences in various places, and fearful events and great signs from heaven. 'Jesus says for behold I come quickly,' So ask yourself r u ready? Sad to say, many won't repost this message.
Let's just face it: shit happens.
Not because the Bible predicted it or that it's all part of God's plan because he works in mysterious ways.
Shit.
Just.
Happens.

Horrible shit happens that's so terrible that people feel the need to justify or explain why it happened or give credit to someone or something to make them better understand things that they can't fathom.
(With the exception of 9/11 of course, we know who the cock suckers were who did that)

My point is that you can read meaning into anything if you want to believe it. Just look at what a certain someone did with the White Album.

What disgusts me most about this whole thing is that it trivializes the losses of life by attempting to inject someone's God-fearing agenda.
Guess what? This isn't about you idiot.
Anyone who posts Bible quotes calling out the end of the world or just commenting about how the Christians are going to be OK when all is said and done should be ashamed of themselves.
No very Christ-like if you ask me.
Jesus would be ashamed of you.

Let the hate mail flow.
-Darth

Quick hit

What his fate would be, he did not know; but he felt that he was held for the coming of that frightful soul and messenger of infinity's Other Gods, the crawling chaos Nyarlathotep.
—H. P. Lovecraft, The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath






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QUICK HIT SMILE - "Duh, Winning!" Edition

Sometimes it just simply says...



my better days are behind me. 

Toothless Bastard!!!  HA HA!  Charlie looks like he bit a brick.  I love this pic so much, I posted it again.

SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING:  "Banging 7 gram rocks because that's the way I roll" causes tooth decay you friggin idiots!!!


This has been a Public "Down Like The Titanic" Service Announcement by Yours Truly,



The Rev

Another Antichrist Sighting!!! According To Jon Bon Jovi...

Greetings pagans, infidels and Scientards!!!  The Rev has been on a brief hiatus but had to return to let the world know that Jon Bon Jovi is not only making terrible music nowadays with his geriatric bandmates but is also spending time identifying the Antichrist as Steve Jobs.  Here's what Mr. Jovi said recently:

"Kids today have missed the whole experience of putting the headphones on, turning it up to 10, holding the jacket, closing their eyes and getting lost in an album; and the beauty of taking your allowance money and making a decision based on the jacket, not knowing what the record sounded like, and looking at a couple of still pictures and imagining it.
God, it was a magical, magical time. I hate to sound like an old man now, but I am, and you mark my words, in a generation from now people are going to say: 'What happened?'. Steve Jobs is personally responsible for killing the music business."

Holy crapola, Steve Jobs is the Antichrist!!!  Glenn Beck would be proud.  Mr. Jovi, you are an idiot!  The invention of the iPod is one of the greatest of our generation.  What the hell do kids care about being able to "hold the jacket" while listening to music.  If people didn't like iTunes and the iPod, they wouldn't have revolutionized the music market the way they did you friggin moron.  Yeah, it was a magical time alright having to buy myself or my kids a CD over and over due to scratching.  It was great having to remove one CD and put in another to be able to listen to a different song by a different artist or to listen to a different song by the same artist but on another CD of theirs.   I really miss the days of walking around with a CD player the size of a woopie cushion in my hand while trying to carry one of those stupid zip up CD carriers in my hand.  Even better, now I don't have to worry about almost getting in an accident in my car after a CD falls out of my sun visor case that never worked properly.  Why don't we just go back to the days of 45's or albums?

When you made this comment, I'm trying to think what was going through your head other than "God I'm old!"  You're Livin on a Prayer if you think people of today agree with a stupid comment like this.  Noone in their right mind is drinking your Bad Medicine.  Instead of giving love to Steve Jobs for his great invention you've chosen to Give Love A Bad Name, Heh Heh!!!  Just shut up and crawl back in your geriatric hole.  Tell you what, help Richie Sambora lay off the plastic surgery and get him on the P90X if you guys are going to continue to tour.  I'm so sick of all these old music minions from the 70's and 80's that keep acting like iTunes is a bad thing.  You friggin dicktards need to stop giving us your outdated opinion, stop touring and retire into the wild blue yonder.  We don't care what you think.  I want you all to fizzle out in a Blaze of Glory...sorry, I couldn't help myself.  To all of you that prefer 8-Tracks, Albums or CD's over iPods, blow me!!!  You're all retards...


Yours Truly,


The Rev

Fun with apps...A (not sure about) Real Review

Since I've been avoiding my network these days, trying to let the "activity" wane. All the kiddie script0rs and haXXies having their fun... Sheesh!
I've spent more time with my iPhone and iPad and some kickin' apps that I now have, most which are free.
And I've taken it upon myself to fuck with as much "media" that yahoos post on the interwebs as possible.














This pic was originally of an admittedly nice looking ass someone posted of a girlfriend/ porn actress/ who knows?! I turned it zombie ass with this free drawing app... Much rejoicing ensued!



















I had a good time screwing with a buddy of mine by telling him I finally got a chance to meet
his new girlfriend while out and about one day and I had taken a picture of her. Of course I MMS'ed it telling him she was quite a looker, and that some one must have dosed the punch bowl with LSD-25 that day too!!
As a result people started having fun in technicolor...




















Of course all of this chicanery wasn't just at the expense of those pic's on the Network that had been fa-schimmeled!

Some of these were gotten by me in real time, then manipulated. Being bored is never a good time for an idle mind such as mine, so something had to be done...





Yours truly,
















Fun with video app's that kick ass is an even more jolly time at the Brady household. Much glee and rejoicing did occur when two free video manipulation apps did appear to me in the apps store..
And the Lord said all was good, except many of the end products I came up with most likely made Him frown with trepidation...


I sent that one late one night to a friend to let him know I was thinking of him... He was graciously 'FREAKED OUT', or something along those lines. I told him I knew he had trouble sleeping and wanted him to have something to do instead of counting sheep... After repeated, what I later found out were desperate protestations to never do that again, I sent him a night cap...

Then, folks... Things started to get retardedly weird from that point on, so I'll just leave it at those couple of items and forego the rest.
You know, I think the moral of this silly shit is... ANGRY CANNOT FUCKING WAIT FOR WARMER, SPRING-LIKE WEATHER!!! I'M GETTING CABIN FEVER! ITS RATHER REMINISCENT OF THE REN AND STIMPY EPISODE "SPACE MADNESS"!!!!
THIS CHICKEN COOP LIFE STYLE QUITE LITERALLY, IS FOR THE BIRDS...
Anyway, these couple of little apps are a strange way to waste time or possibly do your next "video" interview for Goldman Sachs with!
If one has a creative streak running through them, the sky's the limit really ...

Oh! The apps are 1. ColorFX (it's free)
2. iMajicam Pro (.99 cents I believe. The free version has all of the same capabilities, if you like iAD's... Which a lot of you would probably pay fucking extra for! It would seem that most people are like ravens or crows, Bright shiny things mesmerize them.) Anyway I digress, this app has to be used to be fully appreciated! It's one thing to take still photos and have them digitally treated. It is something altogether more amazing when it is applied to video! In real time!
Check 'em out if you care to. Who knows, you might come up with some cool shit you could post on this little site of ours... Or not.

meRRY ©hR1ztmAs everybody.
P.S. I know I know... YOUTUBE YOU SAY!!? Well Google owns that Angry, you hypocrite! Well, they host the site too!!! Wasn't my choice... And if I ever want to show anyone what these videos are all about... I gotta do the "When in Rome" thing...
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Westboro Baptist Church, Common Decency and 8 Idiots

Not sure if these are still good, but can't hurt to give them a try

I can't believe I'm saying this but I have to agree with Sarah Palin; probably a fluke. She made a statement on March 2nd after the Supreme Court ruled in favor of Rev. Fred Phelps and his church of the insane in their suit with the father of a fallen soldier, saying that the Courts rules illustrated the lack of Common Sense and Decency in this country. She tweeted yesterday,  "Common sense & decency absent as wacko "church" allowed hate msgs spewed@ soldiers' funerals but we can't invoke God's name in public square."


Now, you know I'm not much of a God invoker, but I have to agree that there is some real, almost tangible hypocrisy here.


Albert Synder was burying his son Matthew a soldier that was killed in combat in the Iraq in 2006. Phelps' gang of sociopaths gather outside the 1000 foot parameter that the police required holding up their signs with slurs like "Thank God for dead soldiers", and "God Hates the USA / Thank God for 9/11".


Real bunch of sweet hearts.


Matthew's family sued Westboro for mental anguish. They won their suit in a lower court, being awarded $5 million. However with the Supreme Court overturning that ruling, the Snyders may have to pay the fucking creepy Phelps $100,000 to cover their legal fees.


Their lawyer by the way is Fred's own spawn, Maggie Phelps.


To pour piss on a wound, the money will more than likely go to fund more villainous protests like those that disgraced his son's funeral.


Justice Roberts in epic cold-blooded Supreme Court style  described the court's holding as "narrow", whatever the fuck that means.


In a separate statement Justice Stephen Breyer said that in other circumstances governments would not be "powerless to provide private individuals with necessary protection." But in this particular case, Breyer said, it would be wrong to "punish Westboro for seeking to communicate its views on matters of public concern."

I call bullshit on Breyer, Roberts and the other 6 that found for Westboro. 

Complete Bullshit.

What exactly is public about God Hates Fags? This isn't a public concern, its a lunatic fringe church's sociopathic leader's hate-mongering. It's hard to imagine any rational person seeing what Westboro is doing as simple public protest. 


Remember the Justices were lawyers.


Justice Samuel Alito and I however are in complete agreement, and I would have to guess he'd call bullshit on the others as well. Alito stated, the protesters "brutally attacked" Matthew Snyder to attract public attention. "Our profound national commitment to free and open debate is not a license for the vicious verbal assault that occurred in this case," he said.


Exactly, and that's why I have to agree with Sarah "pitbull in lipstick" Palin. As much of a nut job as she seems, or is, she's dead on here. 


I guess sometimes even the crazies think people are crazy.


With all due respect,
The Chief